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In last night's Simpsons episode (Papa Don't Leech) there was a quick exchange between Lisa Simpson and Mayor Quimby that fans of destination branding (and taglines) can appreciate. 

The setup - At the three minute mark in the show Lisa visits Quimby to sell him cookies (Skinny Mints!) and he attempts to pay from the city vault...

Lisa:  Where's all the money?
Quimby:  Why it's right... Uh-oh.  We spent all our money on that new slogan for Springfield. 
[Cut to view out the window where we see a billboard that says "SPRINGFIELD: GOOD"]

Honestly... it's at least as good as most of the recent location branding efforts we've seen lately.  Say WA anyone?  At least Springfield has an excuse for their cartoonish looking Power Trip.

Kudos to the Simpsons writers for pointing out that the clothes the branding industry is wearing right now aren't exactly visible.

Bad Stuff Happens.  Really. 

Don't believe me?  Watch this video:

Yep.  He said SHMMOM.  Now There's a word that just begs to be picked up by cool teens everywhere. 

Or perhaps not...

In the somewhat humble Thingnamer's opinion, SHMMOM doesn't have a prayer.  MILF, however, had a great chance right at the start.  It's even been picked up in the sitcom world and was toyed with on Jon Stewart's The Daily Show - and don't get me started about how the online community has picked up on it (link omitted due to inability to screen out Unsafe for Work imagery.)

Here's a sitcom reference from The Office (Thanks Kevin!):


...And here's the Daily Show reference (Thanks Jason Jones!):


So what's the difference between these two terms and SHMMOM?  It's more than just the production values and presentation.  SHMMOM just doesn't work.

Here's why SHMMOM won't catch on:

• The acronym construct appears unnatural as an English word.
• The words behind the acronym aren't really worthy of being hidden.  If someone's mom is hot most cool kids would probably just say so.  (But some might balk at actually discussing the sentiment behind the MILF description.)
• The format doesn't work well - you can't intuit what the letters are from hearing the word.  The double M is lost, so you just get S.H.Mom. 
  

Here's why the whole thing really shouldn't have been attempted:

• Previously unknown marketing rule:  Statutory rape sells cars!  (Assuming that SHMMOM was inspired by MILF, of course.)  Almost as bad as the Lolita bed.
  
• The target for the ad seems to be the teens who are forced to ride in these vehicles, not the buyers.  It seems odd that you'd appeal to them by suggesting that it'll make their friends want to sex their their mother.  Unless the mom wants to play Mrs. Robinson or your friends are rich and promiscuous I'm not quite sure who this would motivate to buy...
  
• The only way that I can logically see a minivan helping to make a mom look hot is if the vehicle was so ugly that just about anything would be sexy in comparison... I'm not sure how this sells cars...

Here's how it could've been done better:

• Drop the cool.  Cool rarely conveys when people try to look cool in advertising.  Even truly cool people look like idiots when they're put in front of a camera and made to do the same thing forty times...
  
• Drop the underage vibe.  Why not connect with college kids going home for a visit? 
  
• Own the awkwardness - you're not selling cool, you're selling function at all costs.  19 places to put your soda,  the ability to fit you, your friends, and all their crap while traveling in comfort. 
  
• Consider something like "she makes THAT look good" with the retort along the lines of "No... that makes HER look good."  It ain't the sexiness that you're selling here - it's the ability for mom to look like she's got her stuff together. 
  

Just checkin'... does the original commercial work for any of our readers?